How to Have Good Manners

To present a good impression, you must act like you weren't raised in a barn! It is difficult dealing with those having no manners or concern for others. A huge societal issue is a general lack of respect for what has been taught in history regarding human concern and compassion towards acquaintances. Also known as good manners.


Steps

• Think things out before speaking, especially if you are poor at finding the right words. Don't start sentences with awkward 'ums' and 'ers' in between. Practice speaking to a mirror, it works! It increases confidence in speaking, and it sounds much clearer; you may find you'll be using fewer 'ums' and 'ers' next time!

• Don't speak loudly. You will quickly lose respect if you do, as this is seen as overbearing and rude. It can also make others angry and upset before you even establish a relationship with them. They will think of you as a 'big mouth'! Practice turning your volume down.

• Speak with respect to and of others by avoiding negative or insulting remarks. Avoid expressions or theoretical examples implying disrespect, degradation or that invite people to imagine offensive scenarios, like "What's up your butt?" or "How would you feel if someone..." followed by a description of violent or degrading acts. You may not intend this as offensive, but it is. General rule: if you don't want someone to speak about you that way, then don't speak this way to others.

• Don't ever speak of bodily functions, such as using the bathroom or telling crude jokes. Even in casual conversation, this indicates immaturity and often makes bad impressions.

• Always respect all elders, and listen to them and learn. They have been around, and can teach you plenty.

• Using the terms 'Thank you', 'Please', and 'You're welcome' indicates good manners. People lacking in manners avoid these terms.

• Hold open a door for anyone, male or female, following you closely. This is good manners and will never change.

• Speak highly of your parents and show respect for them, even if you don't always feel that way. If you can't, avoid speaking about them at all. It's tacky to insult those who brought you into this world or raised you. Don't air family dirty laundry: it's tacky and rude.

• Do not swear or use filthy language. It can make you sound cheap and disrespectful sometimes. People doing this are usually very immature and lack self-control or respect for themselves and others! Curse words not appropriate and you'll begin to feel more comfortable avoiding them. Profanity indicates an angry person and it puts people off immediately as it's distasteful and offensive. Using decent vocabulary gives the impression of intelligence, self-respect and character.

• Greet others appropriately even if you know someone well. If you are a man, you do not want to greet a woman by saying, "Hey baby, what's shaking?" Instead, try something like, "Hello, good morning or evening," anything making you appear respectful.

TIPS

• Start your day off by smiling and feeling positive. Treat everyone you come across with respect. That way their day may be a good one; and maybe they'll pass that smile and positive attitude along to someone else. Smiles are contagious. Greet your co-workers when you arrive. Say goodbye when you leave.

• If someone else is speaking, try hard not to be domineering or overbearing by taking over the story or subject matter at hand, even if you feel that you can tell it better. Try to let them finish what they are saying, before adding your two cents worth.

• If you are talking to someone on the phone, be sure to pause every once in a while in order to allow the other person time to speak - and take a genuine interest in what they have to share with you. It shows that you care.

WARNINGS

• Good manners doesn't mean that you can't joke and cut-up, and have a sense of humour, don't confuse good manners with being a stuffed shirt and reserved, so to speak. Manners are the stitches that hold the fabric of society together.So let's keep them that way!

• Do not get intimidated or feel ashamed if your friends make fun of you for opening the door for a girl or helping an older person do something they cannot do alone. Being good mannered may seem out of fashion and even silly to some, but it only shows how mature and bright you are, because in the long run, that good you did to others will be returned. (Even if it isn't, you still did the right thing.)

• Having bad manners can be associated with having poor character.

• Don't be overly polite with your peers unless you're in a business setting or you may come across as a weak, spineless, people-pleaser.

• Keep in mind there is such a thing as being too polite. You should be kind, but don't be uptight with all the "polite" rules. As with everything else in this world, there is a happy medium between the two